The Most Important Meeting
The phrase “meeting with my wife” sounds a bit strange, as if we show up with briefcases and presentation decks, shake hands, and negotiate a deal. It’s not that kind of meeting, but it’s the most important one I have (almost) every week.
Kate and I are both relatively well organized. On a scale from “I don’t know where the hell I’m supposed to be” to “every minute of my life is scheduled,” we’re somewhere just shy of the latter.
Admittedly, Kate is the superior planner and organizer, making our weekly meeting more beneficial to me. In return, I (usually) buy the coffee, so it all works out.
The meeting typically occurs on Friday, perfect for previewing the weekend and upcoming week and reviewing any misfires, follies, or miscommunications from the previous days. We don’t come armed with written agendas, but we unintentionally created a routine that seems to work.
Here’s the typical flow:
A Date
Remember, this is my wife. It’s essential to savor our time together, so the first part of our “meeting” is more like a date. While sipping coffee from our favorite local spot (and sharing the occasional chocolate croissant), we discuss noteworthy things we’ve read throughout the week, swap stories that weren’t told over dinner the night before, and vent about anything on our minds.
This is our chance to decompress. We joke, dream about the future, and reflect on the past. We talk about current events, share recent victories and failures, set goals, and discuss whatever comes to mind.
Schedules
Sometimes the transition is natural; other times, one of us asks, “should we go ahead and take a look at our schedules?” We have different scheduling methods, so this is a chance to reconcile. Kate maintains a digital document with tasks, events, and important dates at least several years out. I use the app Todoist in a manner that closely resembles David Allen’s Getting Things Done (GTD) method.
I usually start by scrolling through my tasks, meetings, and events for the next week. Inevitably, I miss a birthday dinner or appointment, which Kate promptly suggests I add. When conflicts emerge, we adjust, sometimes calling the chiropractor on the spot to reschedule an appointment.
Family Tasks
It’s easy to push family tasks off for later, but our productive dates provide an opportunity to complete important but “procastinatable” tasks. Financial decisions, vacation planning, holiday gift planning; all are perfect tasks to tackle as we caffeinate.
We recently updated our estate plan over a series of “meetings,” something we’d been putting off since our daughter was born. For whatever reason, it’s challenging to find time for these items at home, where we’re preoccupied with endlessly reading to our daughter, prepping meals, repairing appliances, and other adulting essentials.
Co-Working
After our schedules are aligned, we spend time co-working. This hour or so provides a buffer for any missed topics. I utilize the opportunity by having Kate proofread posts, sanity check business ideas, or beta test new workflows. We often work on separate projects, silently enjoying the fact that the other is across the table. Eventually, I’ll need to head to another meeting, or Kate will need to attend to the tasks which help our family thrive.
One could argue that such a meeting is a waste of time. Subscribers to more traditional work models might suggest I skip this meeting and focus more on tasks that can directly increase revenue, add new clients, and grow my business. Perhaps that’s true. But if I optimize for my and my family’s health and happiness, I’ll be more focused, motivated, and emotionally available to succeed as an entrepreneur.
If you don’t have a spouse or partner, perhaps you have a friend that would mutually benefit from a cup of joe each week to organize, plan, motivate, and most importantly, enjoy your company.
